Knowing this makes habit change easy!

habit change Kelly Summersett

You’ve got a habit, one that you no longer want. 

Logically you know that it’s detracting from your heath and logically you know what you need to do instead.

Despite what you know to do and how much you want to change, you still have a hard time following through. 

Willpower, control, and negative motivation work…for a while…and then you’re back to happy hours instead of the gym or cake instead of quinoa. 

What gives? Here’s two reasons why changing a habit is challenging:

1. You get a twisted benefit from the habit

You have linked a subconscious ‘benefit’ to your habit and of course it’s not really a benefit at all. A smoker may subconsciously associate calmness to their habit (and ironically smoking is a stimulant.)

2. Your brain loves automation

Your brain loves habits and doesn’t give one shit what the habit is as long as it can automate it and save energy. Our brains love the path of least resistance. 

 

Here’s what you need to know and do to make habit change easy:

Leave logic behind

95% of what you do everyday is not based on logic! Yes, 95%! The much larger part of your mind ‘thinks’ through associations, sensory experiences, and repetition so…

Create a new and strong association and experience that mimics the same ‘benefit’ you were getting with old habit

Here's a smoking example...

If you want to stop smoking and you associate smoking with being calm you need to start associating a new habit with being calm and start experiencing it with an open mind (vs trying hard, using negative motivation, and willpower.)

Make the new association vivid and enticing — so enticing that you’re compelled to keep practicing the new habit because you feel so much more vibrant, clear, and calm when you do it.

You decide to start taking short walks throughout the day instead of smoking. To help strengthen this new pattern, start making a strong association that links walks with being calm. 

Focus on all the real benefits you get from this new association to being calm.

How does it make you feel to be out walking in nature? What benefits do you get from listening to the birds? How do you feel when you take in a deep breath of fresh air? How much more energy and stamina are you gaining with these regular short walks? 

What other benefits can you imagine? Better sleep? Attitude? Happiness? Clarity? A shift in self-confidence? Keep associating these numerous real benefits with short walks. 

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat

You’ve probably heard that it takes 21-60ish days to form a new habit which, in the big scheme of things, isn’t long at all.

Remember, your brain could care less if it helps you walk on a regular basis or smoke, it just knows to take the easiest and most automated path. 

So by repeating your new habit daily your brain begins to form a new automated path of least resistance that feels easy to sustain (just like how smoking became easy to sustain when you repeated it enough times.)

The good news with this approach to habit change? You bypass logic, trying hard, negative motivation, and willpower.

And that is how habit change is done and you, my friend, have the power to do it with ease.

Do you want to learn more about how you work as a human and how to shift into an easier way of moving through your days? 

If you’re local we’d love to have you join us this Wednesday morning when we present our new business to One Million Cups.

Can’t make it? Please click here so you can stay in the what’s coming up loop! We’ve created a dynamic learning recipe that we’re excited to bring to businesses and individuals and are prepared to change 1,000,234+ Brains in the process! 

Staying in the loop gets you exclusive offers and first-in opportunities that won't be shared anywhere else. 

Your Calling is calling you and here’s what it wants

Finding your calling -- Rumi

Ring, ring, ring

Hello

Hi! It’s your Calling calling

I don’t have time to talk right now. I’m very busy working overtime then feeling too tired and uninspired to do anything other than drink wine and scroll through Facebook.

That’s actually why I’m call……

Click

Your Calling is always trying to reach you and it’s your responsibility to stay on the line to hear what it’s trying to say.

As a person who helps people figure out their passion and calling for a living let me start with this FACT: You are here on purpose and have a purpose. 

You’re talented beyond any and all limited beliefs you may have about yourself and it’s your responsibility to share them with the world while you’re alive (and living isn’t the same as being alive!) 

Here’s four things you get to do to that will help you hear and follow your calling: 

#1 Get out of your head

What limited beliefs are you thinking about your situation or life? That you can’t do X because it doesn’t pay enough? That you’re too old? Not experienced enough? It will take took long? That you wouldn’t be respected or will look silly? They’ve all got to go. Got. to. go. 

Allowing your critical voice, family, and society to dictate Brules (bullshit rules…thank you for coming up with that delicious word Vishen Lakhiani!) is preposterous and a waste of your time, energy, and why the F you are here taking up valuable space on this earth.

Tip: You don’t have to be your thoughts. Throw away the destructive auto-pilot ones that reinforce fears and Brules. 

#2 Get it on paper

Like right now. Get out a paper and pen and write down three times when you’ve been filled up with life and everything flowed. What were you doing? What types of people were you with? Why did it have heart for you? What values were you honoring? Did these times have anything in common with each other? 

Tip: You’re calling is hiding, perhaps in plain sight, in these recalled times.

#3 Get going!

Help your Calling out by taking small actions that bring you two closer together. 

Need more training? Sign up for that class you’ve been on the fence about.

Not sure about your specific direction? Schedule an informational meeting with someone who is doing what you’re considering. 

Tip: Any action will move you forward — even the action that seems to be a dead end or not the ‘right’ action. Action wins over ‘thinking’ every. single. time.

#4 Get your attitude dialed in

If you’ve gotten yourself into a pickle because you’ve spent years hanging up on your Calling it probably won’t be easy-peasy to just pick up and leave your job, relationship, or the ‘things’ that eat up your paychecks and time without some planning.

What can you do in the meantime? Have the best attitude possible and bring as much passion and calling as you can to your current set of circumstances or you’re guaranteed to be pretty damn miserable while making your loved ones miserable too. 

Tip: Eckart Tolle says the basis of all stress is being here but wanting to be there so make your here the best it can be and you’ll have much more fun during your process of moving into your new here (life is simply an infinite series of heres after all :) 

Ring, ring, ring

Hello

Hi! It’s your Calling calling

Oh hi! I’m so glad you called! I'm listening

 

Need more resources? 

Download my free e-book The Gutsy Guide to Your Authentic Freedom

Read this blog post: Regain Passion for Your Work

 

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